On Wednesday, I fell in love with a kooky, kooky old lady. I have since chosen her as my role model.
I was showering after my swim, in the big open showers at the rec center, and she entered. She was in her late 60's, early 70's, with a perfectly coiffed straw-colored hairdo, wearing a thick gold rope necklace, and nothing else. She narrowed her eyes at me and watched me lathering up with my scrunchie scrubber, took two steps toward me, and held out a greyish, worn out cloth. "Feel this," she demanded, in a thick German accent.
I wasn't sure I wanted to feel anyone's anything while standing naked in the shower, but she had such a commanding air about her, I obeyed.
"It's a schcrubbie, like yours," she said. "But FLAT. See?" She stretched it out and showed me it was a rectangular shape. "So I can schcrub my back, like THIS!" Then she did an exuberant, exaggerated "scrub-my-own-back" dance, elbows pointed straight up, knees bent, boobs flopping from side to side, looking at me happily. Then she suddenly stopped and said, sadly, "But it's old. And I don't know where to get a new one."
I was absolutely charmed. How did she do it? I wanted every ounce of her unselfconscious, trusting joyousness. I wanted it as my very own.
"Well," I said. "I have one of those at home. "Still in the package. So I can find out the company that makes it and leave you the information. Maybe you can order them online."
"You DO that for me," she said. "And I will cook you something delicious."
"I do like food," I said, helpfully.
"I am a good cook!" she said. "My name is Olgita. You leave the information for me at the front desk--they know me there. On Friday?"
It did not surprise me one bit that they knew Olgita at the front desk. "Yes," I said. "And I'll leave a list of my ten favorite things to eat, too, so you can make one of them for me."
"Oh, ho, HO!" she laughed, pointing at me. "I like you. Yes, I do!"
Man. I like her, too. Very, very much.
